Archive for the ‘Illinois’ Category

Chicago: My Kind of Dawg

Aug 16

It’s hard to drive by a town like Chicago and not stop by for at least a peek.  I could spend hours telling you about the really big buildings (apparently they’re quite famo(u)s), or about some President guy who was born there, or how windy it is; but frankly, I was only there for about an hour, so I’ll pick and choose my subject.  And I choose dawgs.

One of the great things about Chicago is its hotdogs. I love hotdogs. Chicago does them amazingly. The dog is steamed, placed in a poppyseed bun, and topped with mustard, a really green sweet relish, chopped onions, diced tomato, peppers, and a pickle spear. Garnish with celery salt. Bite. Savo(u)r. Chew slowly. Swallow when ready. Cry when dog is finished.

The place we went to is called Superdawg. It’s a drive-in hot dog stand opened in the 1940s, and their recipe hasn’t changed since then. Why should it?

A clearly uptight woman sporting the kind of jogging clothes one wears when one is not doing any jogging was vocally annoyed by the experience.  “It’s only a hot dog stand”, she said to her hapless companion while reading all of the accolades pinned to the waiting area wall.  Only a hot dog stand?  For shame, woman! They don’t call it Super for nothing.

A Place to Call Home

Apr 30

Remember our friend, the Giant Half-Jesus from Ohio on the first leg of the trip? If not, I shall give you a moment to refresh yourself by enjoying again that terrific post…

Ready?  Okay.  Well, our Friendly Giant has finally found a place (H)he can put H(h)imself up for the night.  It’s in a place called Effingham (hee) Illinois.  Driving on the highway headed towards Indianapolis, our eyes could hardly believe it.  On our left, we had the fortune to see the World’s! Largest! Cross!  Oh yes; standing at 198 feet tall, and 113 feet wide, Half Jesus would be proud to call this place H(h)is own. 

The cross is circled by a list of the Ten Commandments.  But these are not the boring display of Commandments one usually encounters.  These had audio.  With just the touch of a button, you can hear the voice of, someone, give you a full explanation of what each of these Commandments really mean in light of today’s modern world.  For example, Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery: no pornography, as pornography is about fun and that is not what G(g)od had intended for the physical act of love.  Thou Shalt Not Kill: don’t drive drunk, or recklessly, as these acts are willful acts capable of killing. 

I learned a lot about my lifestyle that overcast day in Effingham.  Mostly, I learned that my life is probably leading me straight to hell…but, after conferring with Rob, hell is not on our agenda.  I guess we’ll make it to Indianapolis afterall.